In Loving Memory

Those who have been following this blog know that we have been caring for my husband’s elderly mother in our home for the last 3 years.  There comes a time when the body is too worn and tired to continue, and the spirit longs for freedom from it and life’s experiences, some quite painful.  She lost a daughter long ago, before Rick was born.  A beautiful 6 year old who ran into the road after a ball, Sharon was hit by a truck and died instantly.   The experience affected the rest of her life on many levels.

Daughter Sharon who died at age 6.

Mom was fortunate to be able to pass away at home with us instead of a hospital or facility.  Her feline companion Willow and the rest of cats were also in attendance.

Companion cat Willow, taken back in October. One can see the love between these two elder ladies, one human, one feline.

The outpouring of love and support from friends and relatives has helped us tremendously during our time of grief while we transition into a new life without her.  Special thanks goes to Samaritan Evergreen Hospice for all their assistance and compassion during the last 3 months.   We could have not done this without their support, and that of the caregivers we enlisted who have helped us during most of the 3+ years we have had her with us.

It is here I will close my own thoughts, and leave readers with an eloquent note I received from an old friend and long-time mentor.   It has brought us great comfort.

“I join you in your sorrow and joy.  I am aware that getting old is mostly a matter of letting things go, giving up many thoughts and dreams that we compile during our lives.  I have come to believe a page from the Buddhist philosophy, dependency arising.  All things are connected to all things.  Nothing happens without a ripple through the universe whether we are able to perceive it or not.

     I also believe it has been a blessing that she was surrounded by the cats and the farm, all the things that speak of life with their
cycles and acceptance of all that happens.  A few days ago I had a five minute stare down with a four point buck and several does.  He was a little curious but very separate with his little family.  He was also fearless and accepting of our sharing a space and time.  Eventually he went back to eating and I went along my way.  The doe’s weren’t concerned in the slightest.

      There’s nothing special in that five minutes except that we are all here, we all have our part to play and then we go forward to
whatever dimension is next.  The rest of us remain with our memories, selecting out the good and mostly letting the rest fade away.  While I’m in no hurry, to me Death is a friend who I’ll have plenty of time to get to know in the future.  I’m watching the seasons come and go with more intensity than ever before.

     You and Rick have come through a very difficult time that has increased the wear and tear on both you.  You are changed by it as we
all are by every difficulty that comes our way.  Now is the time to sit back quietly for a short while and cement the good while letting the bad find it’s own way down the road.  I admire your strength and fortitude tremendously, both of you.  I want you to finish out this winter and walk into spring with all of its new promise.  I hope you will find renewed happiness in the renewed season.    – K.”

Clouds and blue sky in spring over Salmon Brook Farms.